someone, give this man an honourary degree

i’m so bored…

i received a letter from b-list university today. it included a letter from the dean of graduate studies confirming my graduation in the spring convocation. it also included a blue recipe card with an adhesive label affixed to the rear of it with my name and degree printed on it. i spend two years of my life and almost $10,000 in tuition fees and all i get is a blue recipe card with a sticker on it? nothing but the best for b-list university, i see. at least they're being thrifty. my roommate informed me that i am to hand this blue recipe card to the chancellor for him to read aloud my name when he hands over my degree at the convocation, which, i should add, i have no intention of attending. my roommate also informed me that the honourary degree will be given to a rabbi, who has spent his career looking for cures to homosexuality.

if this doesn’t speak to my utter despair at two years wasted at such a terrible excuse for a university, i don’t know what does.

add to this, that i am currently going seven weeks without pay for my summer research job at the aforementioned b-list university, because a lazy administrator couldn’t be arsed to fill in some paperwork on time. missed the deadline by a couple hours, she did. in o-twat, filling out forms can be rather grueling.

and add to that, that my current concubine, while being rather cute and charming, is – and i mean this in the best possible way – not very interesting. i encountered him at a house party last weekend and barely even acknowledged his presence because, quite simply, there were much more interesting people to talk to. and of course this made me feel like shit because i knew damn well i was making him feel like shit, etc, etc…

i’m so fucking bored...